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Hello Gamers, I am still sick. Talking about tummy pain and eating a little today, so just a heads up! :( I did finally go to the doctor. The day I called I was in such bad pain that if I wasn’t able to go to the doctor that day, I think I would have gone to the ER that night. My doctor seemed pretty concerned and sent me off right away to get some blood work done. Thankfully the bloodwork came back good, and I am not having any extreme symptoms, so I am safe. She started me on some stomach meds for now (we think it might be an ulcer, but haven’t run any further testing) and I am to come back in two weeks to see how I am doing.

I don’t feel myself yet, but after about 4-5 days of meds I am already seeing a big difference. I have some pains, but they are nothing compared to what it was before I went to the doctor. The hardest part for me right now is my appetite. It comes and goes. I think something sounds great, and by the time I go to get it, it doesn’t sound good anymore. Or I take a couple bites and feel stuffed. I know my appetite will become more consistent as I heal, but it still makes me a bit nervous. I’ve been drinking two Enure Plus a day to make sure I keep up with nutrients and calories, but I am trying to nibble on stuff throughout the day.

I think there is some woo-woo stuff that goes around with prebiotics, probiotics, gut health, and all that jazz. I do think these are important things, but I just guess I question how much do these things play a factor or how much of these things do you really need. If that makes sense. I think I am just weary of someone trying to make a quick buck off of health anxious people. That being said, a lot of the foods that sound good to me right now are foods that tend to be good for “healing the gut”. I have been having a kefir every morning. I like the way they taste and it is a lot easier for me chug that down than eat a yogurt. I have also been eating a lot of berries and bananas, which I guess have prebiotics in them. As I feel a little more confident with textures I might start making smoothies again.

I have also been spending extra time doing things like meditation, journaling my feelings, and yoga as it feels comfortable for my body. I know that stress and anxiety can make tummy troubled worse. I have been living with some low grade anxiety for the past couple months now, but it was feeling manageable. I am learning better coping mechanisms and ways to reroute my thinking. I am very grateful that I have been doing these things, because I feel like I have been able to approach my health with a little more of a sound mind than a past me might have, but I can’t deny that it has been tough. I found a therapist office that is within walking distance, that takes me insurance, and was recommended to my by my LGBT support group. I think when I am feeling a little better physically I am going to consider reaching out to them. I am not currently in an emergency, but I think I could use the extra support. I have been nervous to go back to therapy, but I want to be the best me that I can be, and sometimes that means getting a little extra help

Outside of my health, I haven’t been doing a whole lot. I had 3 events/tasks that I didn’t do last week because I was in so much pain. I missed out on an exercise class, my LGBT social group, and my gf and I were supposed to go shopping to pick out a ukulele for me. Thankfully this week we plan to go shopping for that ukulele assuming we are both feeling good! I think I should be. We are supposed to have some nicer weather days this week, so I would love to go for a walk and get some fresh air. Even if I am not feeling good enough to go far, I might take a book outside and read for a bit.

I have been reading and playing my 3DS a lot. Sometimes when I am feeling a good I am playing Splatoon 3. I was playing through Rhythm Thief for the first time, but as my pain was getting worse, it became harder to concentrate on the game. Instead I downloaded Animal Crossing: New Leaf Welcome Amiibo. Fun story for people who want multitple towns, but don’t want to buy multiple carts. Animal Crossing: New Leaf and Animal Crossing: New Leaf Welcome Amiibo are recocgnized as two separate games by the system. Welcome Amiibo is a free DLC, but Nintendo released a version that comes with the DLC packed in. I did not want to destroy my original digital copy of New Leaf’s town, so I just got the digital version of Welcome Amiibo instead to make a new town. New Leaf still holds up really well in my opinion, and I have been enjoying playing a little bit of it each day. I do want to get back to Rhythm Thief at some point and finish it up though! It is such a goofy game and I have been having fun with it.

I haven’t been reading much with me being sick. I just kinda didn’t feel like reading and I didn’t want to force it. When I was at the library last week for the tomato growing presentation I did take a run through the new non fic books and saw a book for beginners on watercolor painting. I have not really messed with watercolor painting outside of school lessons, but I always thought it was cool. I like the way the paint flows and changes with the water and paper. I ended up looking up and putting hold requests on a few different books about abstract watercolor painting and painting for relaxation. Later this week I am gotta help my mom run a few errands, and I might see if we can swing by a craft store for me to pick up some basic supplies. I don’t like– have any plans to become a master artist that will change the world lol, but I think it would be nice for me to be able to let loose and paint my feelings out.

I also read through My Lesbian Experience With Lonliness for the first time. It was a very difficult, and emotional read for me. There were so many times I had to put the book down for a second to sigh deeply to myself or cry a little. There were other times I giggled out loud. While yes, I do think a late bloomer lesbian (like myself) might be the person to get the most out of this book, but really I would recommend this book to a lot of people. It is amazing how less lonely you can feel after realizing that so many other people experience that same complex and miserable feelings you do. I do plan to eventually read some of the author’s other works as well.

After I finish up this post I am going to check up on my town in New Leaf and head into my next book. Kiki’s Delivery Service! I found the novel the movie was based off of at the library the other week and grabbed it. I also borrowed and watched the movie for the first time! It was really nice to watch when I wasn’t feeling well. I am curious to see how the novel compares to the movie! I read Baron the Cat Returns the other month. It is a one shot manga and I was surprised at how short it was! There was a lot of things added to the movie to fluff it out. It was still an enjoyable experience to read. I haven’t watched most Studio Ghibli films, so I am slowly getting around to trying to watch them!

I think that about wraps it up for today! Don’t worry about me too much! I am in good hands! I am lucky to have a doctor that is taking my pain seriously and wants to help me get better. I have a good support system, and I know where to reach out to if I need more help. Remember to take care of yourselfs too! Take a big stretch, a deep breath, and remember to drink water and take your meds. See ya next time. :)